Frequently Asked Questions

Q: Are you really a Humanitarian?

A: Aye, indeed, if in sooth thou art truly a human, for I do not dyspense my servyces upon any beast that hath more or less than two leggs. If thou art not a human yet possesseth two leggs withal, then certes thou art a shaved and trayned ape and do not qualify for my servyces but rather for my pity, for a shaved and trayned ape is not fit anything aside from serving as the Lord High Sherryffe of Bristol.

Q: Do you live in Bristol?

A: Aye, I rent a room on the upper story of the Towne Squayre Public House. Every month I pay my rent to Goodman Willie Drynckmore, the owner of the Towne Squayre Pub, in a timely and enthusiastic manner.

Q: How did you meet Foster?

A: Foster was given to me as a gift from a sailor who had just returned from the Carribbean, and he hath been my faythfull companion ere since (Foster, not the sailor).

Q: Is Jezebel Harlotte your real name?

A: Jezebel Harlotte hath been my real name since the night I were expelled from the convent. The Mother Superior did fynde me in the kitchen with the stable boy and flew into a most terrible rayge. She threw me out into the streets and screamed, "Jezebel! Harlot!" It hath been my nayme ere since.

Q: Is that your own hair?

A: Aye, I paid for it!